Girls and boys are becoming?

How gender identity arises? What makes the child a boy or girl? Psychoanalyst Serge Ephez reflects on female and male and protects a new gender order.

Serge Hefez, psychotherapist, author of the New Nouvel Ordre Sexuel, Pourquoi Devvent-on Fille Garçon?”, Kero, 2012).

Psychologies: You claim that the male or female gender is not determined at birth. Can you explain this?

Serge Ephesus: Despite our biological gender, we are not born a girl or boy, but we become them. From birth, we are bombarded with the requirements that our gender indicate us. Paul and gender coincide when, in addition to the penis, a man has male identification, as well as a manner of living in his body and mind, which correspond to those characteristics that culture indicates as male. From the point of view of psychoanalysis, children are attributed to the gender before they understand the difference between the sexes. It is known that we carry and feed children, and also talk to them differently, depending on whether they are boys or girls. By one and a half to two years, children understand that they have the genitals, and establish their connection with what others expect from them. Until 4-5 years, this understanding remains unstable: the boys still think that their penis can fall off, and the girls, that it can grow up.

So, when educating children, they act, accustoming them to be a boy or girl?

WITH. E.: Moreover, in boys their so -called female part is amputated, and in girls – the so -called male part. According to Freud, our personality is built around the poles: passivity/activity;Mergers/separation. On the one hand, the child enjoys complete passivity in the hands of parents. On the other hand, he takes action on the department: refuses, repels, rejects, goes into the world around him. All children keep these two movements in themselves. Their environment subsequently interprets these positions as courageous or feminine and directs the child to the position that corresponds to its biological sex. The boy is pushed to independence rather in actions than in emotions;The girl is encouraged to be obedient, subordinate, to pay attention to the desires of other people. Everyone loses universality, closes in his gender and interlies these unconscious and cultural ideas about the courageous and feminine.

For thirty years of your career, psychoanalyst has noticed whether you have noticed a change in the perception of the sexes?

WITH. E.: Yes, in a conscious and unconscious plan, the vice is gradually unclenched. Young people grew up in a mixed atmosphere, with the idea that male and female are not two closed and incompatible universes. For girls, the change is clearly noticeable: they are encouraged to be independent and appropriating their active part, so their mental and concrete fate is not at all like the fate of their grandmothers. In turn, most boys no longer believe that feminine means second -rate, unclean or dangerous. https://binishtayehqatar.com/2023/08/24/rexogin-alpha-pharma-fake/ They are also much less afraid of their own femininity. By the way, some go to homosexual experiments – to try – and this does not question their confidence that they are a man or woman. Past generations did not allow themselves to. Or experienced shame on this occasion. Also, young people more flexibly perceive the dichotomy of Mother Schlyuh, which has always been strong in the unconscious. The gaze of men at women has changed;In order to afford to have fun, men are not so need to humiliate women. And women move from one role to another with more freedom. Everyone looks at what is in it from the opposite sex, kindly, and not with embarrassment or disgust, and no longer tries to get rid of it.

Edipov complex is outdated?

“He is experienced less caricatured,” the psychoanalyst Sergei Ephez believes. – The task of the psychotherapists is not to protect dogmas, but to make the initial concepts less strict and allow our patients to soften their internal conflicts and fully realize their potential, not feeling that the norm on them is crushing ”. Some psychoanalysts are pessimistic and believe that men and women no longer fulfill their role as father and mother. Therefore, children no longer understand what a man or woman is, and plunge into confusion. I do not think so. Today our gaze is changing, we consider the gender not as a binary choice, but as a continuum. This is what the eastern philosophy of Yin and Yang tells us, recognizing these two inseparable entities that live in each of us. Each of us has two poles, male and female, between which we are moving “.

Do men and women wish each other just as before?

WITH. E.: Certainly! Over the past 30 years, all public opinion polls show that men and women attract each other more and more, maintain rich and harmonious sexual relations. Areas of sexual games are more open than before, everyone knows the body of his partner better, and we all realize himself better. Those who scream about the society of hermaphrodites, devoid of desire, are actually afraid of only one thing: the disappearance of the Patriarchate. Behind this fear, which men most often express, hides the fear of their own feminization, horror of passivity, the loss of their potency.